i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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