There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
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