Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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