So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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