I'm jealous of your bromance
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize