I don't usually arrange sex via text message
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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