I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize