If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
