I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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