just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
