All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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