Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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