my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize