if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize