yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
