Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
