Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.