Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
