The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize