if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
