My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're like a gay fantastic four
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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