there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
