No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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