The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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