Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Randomize
