discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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