thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
