I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
