The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
