Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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