Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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