Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'm really busy with my period
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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