And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
