what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My dick has a subreddit
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
