Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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