Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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