Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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