We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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