She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
