Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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