Don't make out with my wife yet
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
