Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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