Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
