she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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