wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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