there's paper in my vomit.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
