Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
