i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
