i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I'm passing your future prison.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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