I heard we made out
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
