so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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